stream: destroyed and ended streams

[ronag]

Handle cases where streams are being worked on after ended or destroyed:

• eos on closed (stream: eos on closed #28748)
• ensure writableState errorEmitted (stream: ensure errorEmitted is always set #28709)
• readableState errorEmitted (stream: readable error emitted #29009)
• async iterate destroyed stream (test: async iterate destroyed stream #28995)
• async iterate don't register listeners if ended ([x] stream: async iterate don't register listeners if ended #28996)
• async iterate re-throw errored stream error (waiting for stream: readable error emitted #29009)
• don't invoke _destroy while there are pending operations. (issue stream: Writable should not invoke _destroy while pending ops #29044)

[ronag]

I'm moving this into my own list and will open PR's accordingly when my number of open PR's drop.